Somewhere...

Hi Guys! Wanna go on an adventure with me? Life is short; we only live once, right? Come on, it'll be fun!!!I think it's time for a second one. The first was when I was 18; that's 18 years ago...hmmmm I'm sensing a pattern..
Where are we? Do I look happy or nervous?? Good question. So glad I have friends with connections...The stencil looks good, but that will wash right off. We don't want that.
We definitely want the REAL thing!!! Something that will be with me forever... and ever...
And it looks soooo good! I wonder what I'll add in 18 years.

The annual "work Christmas party" was held last night at our headmaster's home. Complete with cocktails, food, and live music; the night was one to remember! Here are a few shots of me and some of my friends.

Diane, Suzanne, Brad, and me

Diane, Suzanne, Brad, Meghan and me

Diane, Suzanne, Brad, me and Diane

And this is what happens after too many (drinks) pictures....

Happy Holidays! Feliz Natal! Bom Ano Novo! Happy New Year!

I get to work here...

This is the view from the top of our highest block at EARJ. You can see my apartment on the right side, this side of the water, and behind the tallest buildings (brown and cream) in the foreground of the photo. And I'm here for another year...at least.

Excuse now, I must go sit next to the pool for some color before my party this evening.

I haven't done one of these in awhile. So here goes:
I am: an educator
I know: I am lucky to have so many great people in my life
I want: the insurance to reimburse me for my surgery
I have: my health
I miss: my sister
I feel: blessed
I hear: traffic on Lagoa/Barra
I smell: nail polish
I crave: picanha
I cry: when I am really angry
I search: for more hours in the day
I wonder: what 2009 will have in store for me
I regret: not grading student work during my medical leave
I love: my life
I worry: about my family's health
I remember: too much
I dance: every day
I don't: eat cooked vegetables
I argue: for fun sometimes
I write: my blog, on facebook, on student papers, emails, notes--my life's story
I win: happiness
I lose: pens
I wish: I could guarantee a peaceful life for the people I love
I listen: with my heart
I can usually be found: on the beach or next to the pool
I am scared: of people without a conscience
I need: to remain positive
I forget: secrets people tell me

Flowers, Fireworks and the beginning of the Christmas season

I returned home from the hospital to this beautiful floral arrangement from the teachers in the middle school. It is still alive and well and adding such beauty to my home.Although the fireworks at the annual Christmas Tree lighting left much to be desired, I enjoyed an evening among friends. Good snacks, good wine, good company...not much to complain about.

Black Friday...

I just read a pop-up ad: "After Thanksgiving Sale: starts at 4 a.m."

Are they serious?!?!?!

I am busting with gratitude!!

I am so grateful in this moment I could cry tears of joy. And to think a couple of hours ago I was feeling no inspiration for a new blog post.
I am scheduled for minor surgery tomorrow morning. Nothing major--just a hysterctomy (a major step in prevention due to the extensive cancer history in my family). This surgery is performed daily around the world with great success. I have read everything I could get my hands on about what will take place. I have met for literally hours with my primary dr., my ob-gyn, and my surgeon. I have immense faith in all three of these professionals. I am feeling very comfortable with what will ensue in the next 12 hours. Even knowing that I will be undergoing this surgery in a language other than English.
I am used to taking care of me. It's what I've had to do. To a point, in our adult lives, I think we all grow accustomed to this. Yes, I have a loving and giving family, but I have managed to live so far away from them for most of my adult life that I have prevented them the opportunity to "help" (physically) when times of need arise. I rely on them for prayer and council and guidance and a quick kick in the rear from time to time.
Let me just say the members of my Brazilian family are incredible people!! I was showered with hugs and thumbs up throughout the day today and as I exited school, wishing me well during tomorrow's surgery.
My very good friend, Barrie, has taken one of her two personal days to accompany me to the hospital in the morning and sit there with me all day.
My very good friend, Suzanne, is on her way to my house now to spend the night and rise with Sierra, maintaining responsibility for my angel for the days to come. AND...
I just received a phone call from my very good friend, Ana, who insists on making her way to the hospital tomorrow night to keep me company through the night!
Unbelievable!!! Thank you thank you thank you. I am forever grateful!!

I have been slacking. I am actually addicted to Facebook, and I have been neglecting my blog. I also haven't been feeling very creative. The two times I have logged in to this blog, I haven't really felt the creative energy to write a new entry. As I put together this post, I'm not really feeling the creative juices. However, I have some good shots from our second weekend in Macae a couple weeks ago.

The water was pretty rough on Sunday, and the surfers were insane. I was afraid I was going to come up for air to a surf board in my forehead more than once. Sierra opted for the shoreline where her feet sunk deeper and deeper with each wave.Then there was this carload of puppies for sale. Sierra wants a dog sooo badly! It must be the age. Oh, heavens me we are NOT getting a puppy when we live in an apartment. Especially not this boxer! Do you know how big they get when they're full grown?

We enjoyed our "girl" time with big girls and daughters. Dinner out, lazy mornings, lounging on the beach....the things girls like...

Candid shots now and then when it's least expected.

Thanks girls, for a great weekend in Macae!!!

It's A New Day - will.i.am -

I was in love with will i am before seeing this! Now...oh my!

Date Night!

I found the perfect place to play my guitar!

There is a park very close to my house, where a royal family used to live. It is now a preserve/park and open to the public. It is a fabulous little escape from the noises of the city. On the property, there is a cement tower. A man built this tower for his wife, who was an opera singer, so that she would have a space acoustically adequate for her to practice. It is now MY space. The acoustics in this round room are AMAZING!
So last night, I took my guitar--and a bottle of wine--and stayed in the tower 5 hours playing and singing! It is my new favorite place in the city.

I love that even on an uneventful day, I am fascinated by my surroundings.



I was just hanging out on the veranda, looking down at the trees. What do I see?? 2 Monkeys playing tag in the branches.



AHHH, I love living here!!

My "new boyfriend" is clearly my GUITAR. You all understood that, right??

Sssshhhh, I have a Secret Confession...

It is time for me to confess.

I have a boyfriend! Yes, it's true. I am finally admitting it after nearly three months of secret rendezvous and late nights together. He's fabulous --trustworthy, supportive, strong, dependable. He brings out the artist in me. Whenever I am near him, I feel like singing. We have spent hours together, yet each time I hold him I learn something new.

At first I thought it might be more of an obsession or infatuation than anything healthy because I would find myself thinking about him ALL day long. I can be out with friends for happy hour or dinner, enjoying relaxing conversation with great people, and my mind wonders to thoughts of him. I just want to get back to him.

I knew it was problematic the first time I thought about him at work. I didn't even want to work. I just wanted him in my arms, passing the hours caressing his strong neck. That is when I decided it was time to come clean. It is time to make the confession, time to let you all know that very soon I just may start sleeping with this new dream.

So I wanted to share a picture:

Isn't he lovely? Look at the finish! The picture makes me want to play right now, seriously, I stopped typing for a minute to go play a song. I am addicted to this instrument, and it is so much fun. It is challenging and frustrating and my fingers are killing me and I can no longer have long fingernails on my left hand, and it is no where near as easy as Santana makes it look, but it is my new favorite thing.

My family lost a special member last night.

We are no strangers to the cancer monster. My mother is a survivor, battling for the third time as I type. My father is a survivor. My maternal grandmother was a survivor. My paternal grandfather was a survivor. I lost a cousin too young (He was 16.) to this illness. The family tree is riddled with this ugly illness, running through the branches. It is indescribable to be "tired of it". One would think traveling the road once would make it easier a second time, or a third time, or a fourth time, but it doesn't it only pisses you off more. One would think having so many first hand experiences would help the grieving process the next time around. It doesn't. It is horrible and hard and feels unfair every time.

Fighting this illness changes a person. Watching a loved one fight this illness changes a person. Once a person is diagnosed, everything is different. And most of the time for most people, things being different is not ok. It is just different, and we have to find a way to survive it too.

Jason has been battling his illness with everything he is since March of 2007. He was a great cousin. We grew up in close proximity to each other. He was the same age as my brother, and his sister the same age as me. We spent many holidays and summer's days together while kids. He loved the outdoors and everything country--hunting, fishing, four-wheeling, animals. He worked hard. He had great jokes. He did excellent imitations of our uncles that made us all laugh around the bonfire. He was a great fishing partner for Sierra when she was small and learning how to bait her own hook and cast her own line.

Paula, Eden (Jason's niece), Jason--Summer 2007

He will be missed! No matter how you cut it. His absence will be difficult to get over for all who knew him. My rational mind is telling me, "He's with our Savior. He's no longer in pain. He's no longer needing to fight 24 hours a day." My heart is saying, "It's so damn unfair!" Thank God for faith. Thank God I believe he has gone to a better place, to watch over all who love him, to eternal salvation.

A quick Sunday night adventure. Me and my angel!!
Caique with control of the camera takes all the girls by surprise.
Sierra dancin with Caique.
Sierra dancin with Suzanne.

SMILE!!! Life is short.

I walked through the door this evening, returning from work, looked directly ahead through the open door and toward the veranda and this is what I saw...The sun beginning its evening descent.
Before my eyes, the sky changed colors.
The clouds swirled and spiraled.
The pinks began to dance across the ocean horizon.
And evening reared its head.

Campus Wildlife
I have often said that the campus I work on is the most beautiful academic campus in the world. Not only are the views of the ocean and city amazing from the top of our highest building/block, the tropical wildlife (counting the children) are a regular, welcomed distraction from class.
Toucan perching on the ledge of one of our balconies a week and a half ago.Even I, the teacher, have been known to stop class, take everyone to the balcony outside and watch as monkeys or toucans play in the trees outside my window. Despite what the Fruit Loops box taught me as a kid, toucans' beaks are not striped.

The Beach Story
(This blog entry contains sexual content)
So a couple of weeks ago, late on a Friday night/early Saturday morning, I was hanging out at the beach with some friends and witnessed one of the funniest things of my life. Since that night/morning, I have shared this story with several friends here. Today I was prompted to share the story with my blog readers. It goes like this...
The hour is approximately 2:30 a.m. I'm sitting on the steps leading to the sand in Leblon enjoying the enormous waves crashing onto the shore. The weather was changing (again, as it does from day to day during the winter here) and another frente frio (cold front) was on its way. Because of the climate change, the waves were particularly high. If I had to guess, I would say they were at least 50 feet at times. (My spatial reasoning is not my strength) The music of the waves crashing and the back splash they produced were hypnotic. I stared at the water coming in for over an hour that night. Well, around 2:30 an energetic couple entered the beach, descending the stairs near where I was sitting on their way to the sand. The man resembled the old man of the sea--white haired, full beard, leather tan skin and probably 60 something in years. The woman looked like someone enjoying her glory years--mid 40s, fit, smile on her face from ear to ear, happy to be hand-in-hand with the old man of the sea.
They descended the stairs and proceeded to walk the beach away from where I was sitting. The street lights iluminate the beach at night but create shaded areas every 60 yards or so. The spry couple found one of these shaded areas and made themselves comfortable. Mind you, the space is only shaded. It is not dark. It is not concealing. The silhouette of a person in the shaded area can be clearly made out from several yards away.
Once the couple was settled, I went back to the enticing beauty of the waves, marveling at the fact that the residual waters were nearly reaching the steps where I was seated about every fourth wave. They were magnificent. They were powerful. They were forceful.
For a reason I'm not sure of, I glanced back down the beach where the couple had been. And what do I see??? The woman, lying on her back in the middle of the beach. I squinted, wondering where did the man go? Just in time for my eyesight to adjust to the light difference, I notice the man too is lying down, not beside the woman, not under the woman, not even on top of the woman. He was, however, very near her. With tuned eyes the silhouette of the man's head comes into view--facing the woman, but between her thighs! Yes, you read correctly. They had a very adventurous evening in mind when they descended those steps. And although they carefully chose a shaded area of the beach, they in fact were clearly visible to anyone sitting on the boardwalk, walking by on the boardwalk, riding a bike on the boardwalk, most likely even to anyone driving by on the avenue above the boardwalk.
Of course I immediately call the attention of my friends. We all enjoy a shocked moment of "Wow! That's courage. Must be a turn on to know people can see you." before one of those powerful, forceful, particularly large waves crashed to the shore near the mans feet and commenced to engulf the horny couple and all of their belongings.
Both the man and the woman, rapidly rose (the lady without pants mind you) scrambling to grab anything they had laying next to them on the sand before the water whisked it back out to sea as it receded. They hustled up the beach a little further to safety, searched for the poor woman's pants, to no avail. Can I just say that at this moment, I had tears streaming down my face at the sight. The couple successfully find something for the woman to put on. They exit the beach. I am still crying in laughter. I think their moment passed. I think the mood was altered. I think next time they'll pick a different location on the beach at night.

Checking in on H-Town...

As many of you know, I lived in Houston, TX for 5 years. Sierra was born in Houston. Although the state of TX has been known to produce some scary thinkers, I have a special place in my heart for Houston. During my 5 years in TX, I experienced the wrath of several hurricane producing tropical storms. The week after I sold my house in TX, my neighborhood flooded as a result of a hurricane. They are unbelieveably strong forces of nature. When water falls horizontally, it is frightening. Well, Ike made landfall in Galveston early Sat. morning, ripping apart much of the coastline. This storm was so strong there is hurricane damage as far as downtown Houston--approximately 60 miles north of the coast. Windows in skyscrapers DOWNTOWN were blown out.
Saturday morning, I attempted to call several members of my TX family. All I heard were busy signals. I think the lines are still down.
As of this morning, I have heard from LaShunda, KaSandra, and Cindy. All of them and their respective family are safe. KaSandra had evacuated to Odessa where her extended family lives, but she has no true idea of the condition of her home near Houston. LaShunda was hiding behind a bed for fear of the wind crashing in the window, and with the exception of some leaks in the roof and a few windows Cindy's house is in tact--as well as her loved ones.
I'm just waiting to hear from Lorry. I am assuming she too is without power and cannot access email or telephone lines.
Big hugs to all of you and sending as much energy as you may need in the clean up process.

Of COURSE I had to play with a picture of Sierra too....

Here is what she would have looked like in 1984.

And in 1978 she would have been one foxy momma!!

LMAO!!!!

You have to try this site: http://www.yearbookyourself.com/

Here are my results....First there is me in 1956...so scary I have no comment!

Then there's me as my MOM!! in 1966. This is strikingly similar to her.

Here's me with sexy, long straight hair in 1974.

And as my sister in 1976!!

And this one (1990) is so similar to my actual senior picture I peed my pants when it loaded!! Even the pose is the same! Oh, Aqua Net!

And then I loaded this one from 1994, and I realized this is closer to what I actually did with my bangs during that period of my life! What was I thinking?

Thanks Jill, for providing the link on your site--http://brennekids.blogspot.com/. It made my night.

New painting for the house...

pretty, huh?

When you rise before your alarm and are greeted by awesome beauty....it makes it ok! (even at 5:30 in the morning)

I've been doing a lot a thinking lately. Not just the every day thinking. The deep, introspective kind of thinking. The kind you can get lost in. Too many ideas have crossed my mind in the past month to list, but two very important goals have come from hours of sitting still:

1. Don't borrow worry Sara.

2. Capture moments.

I'm making a conscious effort to avoid overly stressing out. I am working to not fret about the small stuff. Most importantly, I am letting go of things I can't control. Why worry about something that will never be? It takes too much precious energy. Life is fragile.

As I find myself more and more often with a large grin on my face, I am stopping to breathe in the moment, to capture it, to freeze it in my mind's eye. It comes from being so completely grounded and emotionally healthy--it is an amazing feeling.

But these things are sometimes easier said than done. However, I think a higher power is keeping His eye on me, helping me to stay on track with these two personal goals I have set, for when I might be losing perspective, I am gently reminded with an awesome view like this:and I remember that beauty surrounds us, people are priceless, time will pass but memories are forever and this life we each trudge through is a true blessing!

Chilly Macae!
Here are a few more pictures from our weekend in Macae with Francesca and Sophie. My camera batteries died in the first morning, so I had to wait this week for Francesca to upload and send me the shots from her camera. Here's me the first night in Cesca's apartment...it was late and it was chilly (it is winter here afterall) as the wind off the ocean blew through her veranda door.

We enjoyed a couple of hours on the beach Sat. afternoon, despite the breeze and overcast. Neither of us ended up in our bikini--it was too cold, but we had the chance to have Sierra take this shot of the two of us. My neice saw this photo and said I look like my sister here. (I often look like my sister.) Another friend of mine looked at this picture and said Francesca and I look like WE could be sisters. She's such a good friend of mine that she's like a sister, so I guess that counts, right?
Here is the beach in front of her building. The last building on the right in this picture is Cesca's apartment building. Seriously!?! Could you stand it? The only thing you hear is the ocean crashing on the shore! It's amazing.
Our angel babies, Sierra and Sophie. Despite the 5 year age difference, these two played extremely well all weekend long. Sierra is the patient "big sister" and Sophie is a gentle joy to be around.
Would you take these two to lunch?? We did!! Proudly!

I think this year will find us in Macae often, visiting Cesca and Sophie. It is a beautiful, quiet city just outside of Rio and a welcomed rest from busy, noisy city living.